Our Sermons

Bible Passage: Mark 10:2-9
Pastor: Pastor Berg
Sermon Date:  October 10, 2021

“They don’t make ‘em like they used to.” I’m guessing you’ve heard the phrase or perhaps have used it yourself. And it’s true, technology has changed the way that things are made. That phrase could have been used the day after the assembly line was invented or the day that electricity replaced coal and oil and steam, the day the computer replaced the typewriter. They don’t make ‘em like they used to. However, I’m pretty sure that when people use that phrase they don’t have those things in mind. No, when people say, “They don’t make ‘em like they used to,” they’re lamenting the fact that things today don’t seem to have the same lasting quality. Our society has become a disposable society. They don’t make things the way that they used to because it’s cheaper and more convenient to make things that don’t last that long. Just think for a minute. We live in a world of disposable diapers, paper towels, and plastic spoons and forks. We rent cars, rent tools, and rent vacation homes. We trade in old cars, old jeans, and old appliances. We upgrade computers, video games, tv’s and phones at an alarming rate. They certainly don’t make ‘em like they used to. 

Is it any wonder then, that this disposable mindset has crept it’s way into other areas of life, including marriage? Hasn’t our society as a whole become to view marriage as disposable, commitments as temporary, and spouses as logical trade-ins? While we as Christians don’t view marriage as disposable, it seems much of society treats it this way. Divorce rates are actually down from the past, but much of that is because people simply aren’t getting married to begin with. The family structure is being ripped at the seams. Unity, order, stability, security–all the things a marriage is to provide for the family–are unknown in thousands of American homes. This isn’t surprising, though. Our society has embraced the lie that there are no rules to govern sexual conduct, that God’s design for marriage is obsolete, that marriage’s rights can be had without any responsibilities, that love is love and no one can say any different. We live in an anti-marriage world and this viewpoint is actually tearing apart the family atmosphere society thinks it’s promoting. And frankly it’s frightening. So where do we go from here? 

As we do every week, we turn to God’s Word. And as we have been for the last number of weeks, we turn to Mark’s gospel and we see what Jesus values. May we strive to align our values with Jesus today and as we do, we will see that Our Family Values Marriage.

Jesus’ teaching on marriage in Mark 10 was prompted by a question from the Pharisees. But, it really wasn’t a question about marriage, but rather about divorce. Divorce isn’t a modern invention. In fact, divorce was such a problem at the time of Moses that he was forced to make a law concerning divorce. Here’s the question and initial dialogue: “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” [Jesus] replied, “What did Moses command you?” They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.” These Pharisees were hoping to trap Jesus into taking sides on the divorce issue. There were two schools of thought promoted by the Jewish leaders in Jesus’ day. The school of Hillel taught that you could divorce your wife for “anything indecent.” This could be as mundane as burning supper! It was basically a free for all, much like today. The school of Shammai insisted that divorce was only allowed if the wife was guilty of unchastity, a term that was less than sexual unfaithfulness, less than abandoning the marriage. 

Both were wrong, because both schools of Pharisees saw marriage as only a man-made contract; something that could be dissolved if there was sufficient cause. Sounds familiar doesn’t it? But look at Jesus’ answer. “[Moses] wrote this command for you because of your hard hearts. But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” At the beginning, before sin had corrupted the world, God made them male and female. Adam and Eve didn’t just happen to bump into each other and decide to form a contract to live together as husband and wife. God joined them together. It was his plan from the beginning that Adam not be alone. So he created a perfect complement, a perfect teammate, a perfect helper and united Adam and Eve as husband and wife. Because it was God’s plan, man has no right to separate or destroy what God has established. Marriage was part of God’s original plan and is still part of his plan today. 

God’s Word is unchanging. It never goes out of style. It’s not obsolete. And that includes what God says about marriage. Marriage is a life-long commitment between one man and one woman. Marriage isn’t entered into on a trial basis. Marriage is for keeps. That’s what Jesus means when he says, “So they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.” And here’s the key. The failure to recognize the unconditional nature of marriage is the reason for the frustration and instability in so many marriages today. I’ve even heard of people changing their wedding vow from “as long as we both shall live,” to “as long as we both shall love.” Many couples enter marriage not with a view of life-long commitment, but rather a romantic view of love. In their own minds, they picture this utopia where the twitterpated feelings that they have for their spouse on their honeymoon never disappears. But then the honeymoon ends. Reality sets in. That utopia is destroyed. The blinders are ripped off and the nitty gritty problems of life come flooding in. And instead of going back to the foundation of commitment, their foundation of feelings is gone. “We just don’t love each other anymore,” they say. And divorce is the logical option. 

God hates divorce. I know hate is a strong word, but it’s the word God uses in Malachi chapter 2. God hates divorce because divorce because of the destruction it brings to the people he dearly loves. Can you see how? Divorce has devastating effects. It fractures the closest human relationship in the world. It turns happy memories into painful pictures. It carries with it a stigma that even an innocent party in divorce will have to deal with. Not all divorces are equal. In many cases, there are innocent victims, spouses who can seek a divorce because of unfaithfulness or abandonment that doesn’t violate God’s Word. 

Yet, how often are people quick to jump to conclusions about what happened? May we be quick to listen and slow to speak when talking to someone about divorce. Yes, divorce is sin, and God hates it. But God also forgives. All is not lost because of sin, because of divorce. If anyone knows anything about a healthy marriage despite sin’s destruction it is God. He entered a covenant with his people. He promised to be faithful to her and love her always. But his people, like an adulterous bride, were not faithful. They turned to other gods. They did not love him above all things. They weren’t faithful to that union. And this isn’t just the Old Testament people we’re talking about. This is his people still today. We have broken God’s design for marriage, for parents and children, for families. Yet, God doesn’t change. He has remained faithful to his promises. Jesus could have left his bride even as he was abandoned on the night before he died. But God’s will was that Jesus suffer and die for his people, his bride. There was no going back. There was no giving up. Jesus would love until the end, even if it killed him. 

For his bride, the Church, Jesus came to this earth. And even though the Church is guilty of dishonoring marriage, he still came. And though his people would continue to struggle with divorce, he still loved his Church. For her, for us, so that he might remain united to us, he gave himself up. In order that his bride might be holy and blameless, without any stain or wrinkle or blemish, he died for her on the cross. That is the love of Jesus for you, me, and for all. That is the love he has freely given us in order to keep us united with him forever. 

As his bride, we the Church stand forgiven and pure. We have been reconciled to Christ by his cross. He lives and promises that we will join him at the eternal wedding feast, never to leave his side. This is the love that God shows us as his bride. And this is the kind of love that husbands and wives strive to reflect in their marriages. Forgiveness and selfless love drive a marriage closer. A love in a marriage is a love not just of attraction or affection, but a love of choice, a love of commitment. Love, from God’s point of view, is not the basis for marriage, but rather the product of a committed marriage. Holding to the love of Jesus makes for a healthy marriage because Jesus’ love never fails. There’s no going back, there’s no giving up. We are committed to love to the end, until death do us part.

Our Family Values Marriage because our God values marriage. He established it for the good of his people. He models it in his relationship with us. Marriages take work and effort. And there’s no better place to start than being together in God’s Word. Our synod has been producing a wonderful resource called “Marriage Moments.” It’s a short 2 minute video which points us back to God’s Word and helps us apply it to our marriages. Pastor Schlicht and I would be more than happy to help you find this resource and it’s another way to live that God Lived Life of discipleship. 

Marriage is hard work and it takes effort and because it involves two sinful people it’s going to be plagued by sin. There are going to be challenges. But it doesn’t have to end in divorce. We can overcome those challenges by going back to the love of Jesus whose love never fails, whose love empowers us to love our spouses, who will never abandon and never fail us as his bride the Church. Maybe for much of our life experience, they don’t make ‘em like they used to. But that doesn’t have to be the case for marriage. May God help us to speak up for, defend, honor and support his gift of marriage. And may God bless all husbands and wives that they may grow closer to each other and to their Savior. Amen