God Likes Good Sex

Bible Passage:

Song of Songs 1:1-4

Pastor:

Pastor Mike

Download:

26web.mp3

Sermon Date:

2011-02-05

I have a book that makes people uncomfortable. It’s not the Qu’ran or the DaVinci Code. It’s a skinny pink book with a provocative title. SexGod. That combination makes people uneasy. We can say PrayerGod or GivingGod, but SexGod just doesn’t seem respectful. Likewise, we can say “God loves sunsets” or “God loves sharing”, but if we say, “God loves sex,” people pick up mental stones and accuse us of blasphemy. Sex and God seem like concepts to be kept worlds apart, especially on Sunday morning

But I wonder if that separation is good for God’s people. After all, Sunday morning might be the only time we don’t learn about sex. The shows we watch, the SuperBowl ads, and the magazines at Woodmans are more than willing to be our instructors on the subject. The question, then, isn’t if someone will teach you about sex. The question is simply who will.

God has always recognized that fact. When he wrote the Old Testament, the first part of the Bible, he knew the Canaanite culture was teaching his people about sex. That culture claimed the gods of nature would send rain from heaven once they had been aroused by sexual acts here on earth. When God wrote the New Testament, he knew the Greek culture was teaching his people about sex. That culture promoted adultery, premarital sex, homosexuality, sex with children, orgies, and temple prostitution. Not surprisingly, the word “sex” appears 77 times in the Bible. God knew his people were always being taught about sex. So he talked about sex all the time. He wanted his people to learn from the right Source.

If God wrote us a book today, do you think he’d talk about sex? Is our culture as sex-crazed as the Canaanites and the Greeks? A glance at the checkout aisle might answer that. Have you noticed how most marketing is targeted at making you “sexy”? How to get sexy hair, sexy skin, sexy abs, and show you the sexiest jeans of the season. Or go online. Statistics tell us “sex-crazed” isn’t strong enough for our obsession with internet pornography. According to internet safety expert Jerry Ropleto, over $3,000 is spent on internet porn every second and every second over 28,000 internet users are viewing pornography. That means before I finish this sermon, over 558,000 sex-related searches will be made and over $4.8 million will be spent on internet porn. In 2006, the porn industry made more than MLB, NBA, NFL, and NHL combined. So if you think baseball is America’s favorite pastime, you’re wrong. According to Dr. Michael Leahy, author of “Hooked: How Sex Affects Our Brains”, 46% of high school students have had sex and over 70% of graduating seniors have. On average, a child is first exposed to pornography at age 11, often accidentally as he works online for a school project. So statistically, some of the children who left church today have already seen explicit sexual images. Maybe that’s not surprising in a country obsessed with sex.

Stories from pop culture are even more revealing. Abercrombie, a popular store for teens, sells shirts that say, “Female students wanted for sexual research.” On television, Jersey Shore is the #1 rated cable show. MTV cast a group of young, sexually-charged partygoers, paid for their alcohol, and taped the results. You don’t have to be a fan of the show to guess what resulted. Ashleymadison.com is a website devoted to help married people cheat on their spouses. Last year, the company approached the New York Giants and offered them $25 million to rename the Meadowlands Stadium “Ashleymadison.com Stadium.” Fortunately, the Giants declined the offer. Unfortunately, the offer proves business is good for Ashleymadison. And then there’s Sesame Street. This year’s season premier featured a duet between a well-known pop singer and Elmo. However, when the singer chose her outfit, she apparently forgot Sesame Street is for 2 year-olds, not 22 year-olds. The directors and producers taped the show and planned to air it until outraged parents expressed their disbelief over her outfit.

What does this all prove? The Canaanites of the Old Testament and the Greeks of the New Testament got nothing on us. We know “sex sells” and apparently everyone is trying to sell something. So if God lovingly talked about sex back then, don’t you think he wants to talk about sex with his people today?

If you’re still not convinced, you need to know this isn’t just about “those people out there”. This is about God’s people “in here”. Though you may not talk about purity and pornography in the meet-and-greet session after church, our members are wrestling with sexual issues. Couples have been devastated by adultery. Church-going men have admitted addictions to pornography. Lutheran high school graduates are living together before marriage, despite what they learned. I once tried to identify the owner of a cell phone left at church and found naked pictures of the owner’s teenage girlfriend. And, if we’re honest, we’d admit we don’t know how to handle sex. Parents don’t know how to talk about it with their kids. Teenagers don’t know how to handle the confusion and pressure of high school. Christians wrestle with sexual identity and don’t know if they can talk about or whom they can talk about it with. Married couples accept bland sex lives. And most of us have no clue what God says about these issues.

That’s why we’re doing this. That’s why we need to hear what God says. We know not all of you are married. Some of you aren’t yet. Some of you were. Some of you never will be. But we hope you see the need to teach all of God’s people about sex. We know many of you never heard a word on godly sexuality. So, let’s take a few weeks and talk about it. Let’s open the Scriptures and see the plans God has not just for our souls, but also for our bodies. Let’s take something so common in our culture and set it apart as something sacred. Let’s sanctify sex.

To do that, we’re going to spend four weeks in a part of the Bible you’ve probably never read and never heard in church. It’s a book that sometimes makes you think and sometimes makes you blush. It’s called Song of Songs. This book has been the object of constant discussion as Christians have tried to figure out if this is a real story about life, love, and sex or if this is a metaphor about God’s love for his Church. The discussion has been so intense that this six-page book of the Bible is the basis for the largest book I own, a 1300-page commentary. As we dive in today, I will suggest that Song of Songs is a literal description of God’s love of good sex and also a subtle message about his spiritual love for people. So are you ready to go?

As we start, notice there are three characters in Song of Songs: The wife, called “The Beloved”, the husband, called “the Lover”, and their friends, cleverly named “the Friends”. Chapter 1: “Solomon’s Song of Songs. (Beloved) Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth—for your love is more delightful than wine. Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes; your name is like perfume poured out. No wonder the maidens love you! Take me away with you—let us hurry! Let the king bring me into his chambers. (Friends) We rejoice and delight in you; we will praise your love more than wine. (Beloved) How right they are to adore you!”

Note the author of this book: Solomon. This is not some hormone-fueled frat boy. This is the one God calls “the wisest man who ever lived.” Note the title of this book: Song of Songs. That’s a Hebrew way of saying, “The best song”, like “Lord of Lords” means “The greatest Lord.” The Bible says Solomon wrote 1,005 songs, but this one is the best. This is Solomon’s greatest hit.

Note the details of these opening verses: A woman wants to be intimate with her husband. She doesn’t say, “Let him pray for me and read a devotion.” She says, “Let him kiss me.” She wants a romantic and passionate moment. Why? “For your love is more delightful than wine.” The word “love” here refers to lovemaking. This isn’t just “sex”. This isn’t just a physical act. It’s emotional. It’s personal. It’s sacred. It is “more delightful than wine”. She doesn’t want a glass of Merlot. She wants to make love to her husband. For this wife, making love is not a duty; it’s a hobby. It’s not a requirement for childbearing; it’s a recreational pastime! “Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes.” Guys, this is God’s advice on personal hygiene. By nature, you and I are stinky. If you want a biblical sex life, don’t be stinky. Take a shower. Buy deodorant (and use it). Have her pick out a cologne she likes. “Your name is like perfume poured out.” Ah, this is even more important. In the Bible, a person’s name was their character, their reputation. This wife wants to be with her husband because his character is sweet “like perfume.” She likes thinking about his name, the way he treats her, the way he loves God and loves her. “Take me away with you—let us hurry!” She’s excited about sex. This is a man she loves and a man who loves her. That love makes her want to make love.

And here’s the main point for today: God doesn’t object. God doesn’t jump in and scream, “Hey! This is the Bible! You can’t talk like that! “Kiss me?!? Take me away?!?” Do you think this is late night T.V.?” No, not a word of that from God. In fact, God inspired this. The Holy Spirit guided Solomon to write these very words. That fact will shock you if you take 5 minutes and read all of Song of Songs. The sensual language. The sexual imagery. The phrases that make you think, “Wait. Is that saying what I think it’s saying?”

Why would God inspire a book like this? Because sex was God’s idea! God invented sex. God holds the patent on the act. God drew up the blueprints for our bodies. The proof is in paradise. Back in the Garden of Eden when everything was perfect, God created man and woman, united them in marriage, and said, “The two shall become one flesh.” Jesus went back to that perfect design in our Gospel lesson when he talked about starting a new family through marriage and becoming “one flesh” with your spouse. 1 Corinthians 6 tells us “one flesh” is not just a metaphor for family life. It’s a reference to the physical act of making love. Simply put—God likes good sex. God likes it when you help the poor. God likes it when you forgive your enemies. And God likes it when spouses enjoy the wedding gift he designed and gave. God likes good sex.

Maybe that sentence makes you uncomfortable because Christians warn people about sex more than they praise it. But Song of Songs allows us to be sexual optimists and celebrate sex as a gift from God. Others have done that. Traditionally, Song of Songs was one of the five books the Jewish people read during holy days and religious festivals. That would be like us reading it during a Christmas Eve service! But to the Jews, there was no disconnect. “We’re worshiping God for his gifts. Sex is a gift from God. So why not worship God for giving us sex?!”

As pastors, teachers, parents, and friends, we need to balance our warnings about bad, sinful sex with a celebration of good, godly sex. I think, historically, churches have emphasized the former. “Don’t have sex until you’re married.” “It’s sinful for you to have sex now.” “Don’t look at pornography!” Are these warnings appropriate? Yes. Because God hates bad sex. He says just like he will judge thieves and gossips and racists, he will judge adulterers and the sexually immoral. Because God hates it when we set our bodies up as idols and worship what feels good instead of what God says is good. He hates it when teenagers tear open the present God intended for their wedding night. He hates it when spouses cheat, people look at porn, and couples consensually sin against his design for sex. God commands us to repent of sexual sin because she might be hot, but so is hell and that’s where unrepentant body-worshipers go.

But don’t forget the symbolic message of Song of Songs. More than this husband loves his wife, God loves us. That man’s “name was like perfume poured out”, but the name of Jesus is even sweeter. Jesus has pursued us more than a love-struck husband pursues his wife. Jesus’ “love is more delightful than wine”. Not his sexual love, but his selfless love, which led him to the cross. There Jesus cleansed us from impurity. There Jesus covered the stains of our sexual sins. There Jesus took away the shame of late nights online and the guilt of premarital sex. At the cross Jesus gave us a new outfit to wear—a pure, white, spotless outfit called righteousness. Like a bride in a shimmering dress, God has made us beautiful in his sight. And just as a man holds his breath as his bride walks down the aisle, heaven holds its breath as it realizes what Jesus has made you. You are not dirty in God’s sight. You are not a deviant. You are not impure. Through faith in Christ, we are cleansed, perfect, and pure.

As God’s sanctified people, we can balance our warnings about sex with our celebration of it. We can praise it as the sacred gift that it is. Parents, can I encourage you, at the appropriate age, to give your kids a godly perspective on sex? Be a Genesis 1 and 2 parent. Genesis 1 parents say God made the man and the woman and the birds and the bees. Genesis 1 and 2 parents go on to teach their kids about the man and the woman and the birds and the bees. Not just the biology, but the theology. Teach your kids God likes good sex.

Finally, let’s rescue sex from our culture and restore it to the place God intended it to be. Let’s remember our sexuality is like fine china. Fine china is set apart in a special place. It’s protected and handled with care. You can toss around paper plates and toss them out after dinner, but not china. China is for special occasions. Your sexuality is like that. Don’t treat it as a paper plate you pull out on the third date. No, set it apart for someone special. Protect it. Handle it with care. Don’t secularize your sexuality. Sanctify it. Don’t give it away to every girl with a pulse or every guy who tells you he loves you or to every online fantasy. Set it apart as something sacred just like God does. Because you are sacred. Your body is sacred. And because God loves good sex. Amen.

Mike, I was compelled, in a

Mike,
I was compelled, in a sense, to read these just to see how you have been feeding your people these past weeks. Maybe it's just me, but I was not as 'offended' as those who said I should read. I think you have a good thing here.
Just out of curiosity, what kind of feedback have you heard from people about this? What haven't you heard but know people are saying?
Just wondering. Maybe I'll catch you after ball on wednesday.

Nate

Posted by Pastor Nate (not verified) on Mar 1st, 2011 at 1:22 pm.

Pastor Mike (and Pastor

Pastor Mike (and Pastor Glenn),

Thanks so much for being so bold to speak of God's Word on sex. Not just the sins, but the gift. It being a gift of God has been spoken in the past in my life, but it was a moment, like a whisper; If you didn't hear it, you missed it and probably weren't going to hear it again. At the same time how is it a gift? We focus so much on the negative and what you should not do, but if we are to be fruitful and multiply how else do we do that than by having sex? We NEED to know how sex can be godly. It can't be taboo in our churches. You are right we are learning about sex, whether or not we want to, and whether or not it is in a positive (godly) way. And it can be, at least for me, awkward to talk about sex. For how many more in the Church? Are people going to be willing and daring, in a sense, to walk up to a pastor or a trusted God-fearing Christian and ask how is sex good? how is it a gift of God? how can I please God in this intimate act? how can I demonstrate the pure selfless love to my spouse in this special intimate way (not necessarily in the physical way, but "is my heart in the right place")? Thank you again.
"So whether you eat or drink or WHATEVER you do, do it ALL for the glory of God." 1 Corinthians 10:31 (emphasis mine).
In Him,
Katie R. :)

Posted by Kathryn Rebernick (not verified) on Mar 16th, 2011 at 8:19 am.